Monday, April 1, 2019

South Beach, bringin the heat.

Party in the city where the heat is on
All night, on the beach till the break of dawn
"Welcome to Miami""Bienvenidos a Miami"

MIAMI, MIAMI, MIAMI. Where do I even begin? Miami was truly quite the time. I was fortunate enough to bring my Quarter Life milestone in with my best friend and a great week in the sunshine! Let me break it down for you..

The very first day we arrived in the early evening and were overwhelmed by our Airbnb host sending me 50000 texts about coming to meet us before we even landed. (Is this the Miami way? Idk it was a lot though). When we finally got to the BnB we were greeted by our host who I'm 96% sure was making sure we weren't going to be troublemakers (spoiler alert: we are). Then found our way to a grocery store to get our night one dinner and drinks of course. Night one was quite an experience. I had heard there was a club E11EVEN which was a 24/7 club and thought it'd be the perfect way to kick off our trip... WRONG. We get to this club, wait in line for roughly 45 minutes, get inside only for me to pay $42 for two basic tequila drinks. *Insert photos of me internally crying here* OH OH OH, to top it off, this "club" turned out to be a strip club on steroids and you don't even wanna know the things that we saw. After spending probably 30-45 minutes in said club (lol) we decided it was time to find something a little more our speed... cue this cute little outdoor bar called 1306 - SHIT WAS POPPPPPPIN'. Jenn and I walk in 10 minutes to close, crashed someones 90s themed birthday party, and had a lovely 10 minutes of her twerking on me while I sat in a chair dancing bc my feet felt like they were going to fall off at any given moment. 

Our first full day in Miami started out with bottomless bellinis/aperol spritzers at the cutest little restaurant called Limonada... and when I say bottomless.... I really mean we had about 73 pitchers of bellini and a spritzer or 17. It was absolutely out of control. We sat around for hours having chug challenges and giggling about typical Jenn and Katie things - I loved every second of it. The food was absolutely amazing as well - I had the Avocado Toast and it was truly to die for. To make the scene EVEN more delightful Limonada had THE cutest little photo wall to remind us all that when life gives you lemons you should make 'Limonada' which really is something that I think we should all live by. After death by Limonada, we made our way back to our Airbnb for a much needed nap before an incredibly large and in charge dinner at an incredibly fancy schmancy restaurant called Barton G. Barton G was quite the spectacular place that I recommend anyone go once in their life if given the opportunity but you really only need to go once. It's an extremely expensive high end restaurant which puts most of their focus on the presentation of their items than the actual quality I'd say. The displays in this place were insane, my personal favorite was our dessert 'Show Me The Money' which featured an oversized $100 bill, a fake safe, and GOLDEN CHOCOLATE COINS... YEP, just like from your childhood. While it was incredibly cool to appreciate the displays put together, they also kindly gave me the worst tummy ache ever :-( killin' my vibe for the night. After dinner, we hit South Beach to visit the infamous Mango's Tropical Cafe for a night on the town. Mango's is somewhere I'd absolutely recommend people attend at least once in your life. You will be absolutely floored by the talent there (I won't disclose if I mean that in a good or a bad way) it's a sight to see. Once we got enough of our premium talent fix, we hit up a local Cuban Restaurant, Havana 1957 at the Breakwater Hotel, for a late night snack before hitting the sack. 

The second full day started out with a bang - DRAG BRUNCH AT R HOUSE. I must say this may have been the absolute highlight of the trip for me. If you have never attended a drag brunch, you absolutely must, and don't forget a fat stack of dollar bills for all the ladies because oh my god they are so talented. Not to mention our glittery bearded waiter was the life of the party jumping on tables, twerking on guests, you name it - he did it. At the beginning of the show, the host went around identifying everyone celebrating something in order to wish them a happy whatever and of course I shared that it was my birthday. Soon after informing of said birthday, we were warned that everyone who was celebrating would be a part of the show and that we needed to drink up. (FML FML FML) DOWN THE RED SANGRIA PITCHERS WENT lol. After getting a bit of a buzz going, it was finally the end of the show and *apparently* my time to shine.... I HAD TO TWERK IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE RESTAURANT - yes me, no rhythm, awkward af, foot tapper, finger snapper Katie had to TWERK IT FOR A REAL ONE. My prize? A shot - yummy my favorite .... lol (if you know you know). After brunch we made our way to South Beach to lay out and had a little fun in the sun. That night we went out and I shameless asked men if they could name the 5 oceans (shoutout call her daddy) and then called it a night. 
Day Three kicked off in the late morning with lunch at Bodega - a taco shop we were dying to check out that had the absolute creepiest dark bathroom I had ever seen which Jenn called "relaxing" lololol. And then we decided to walk to the beach, the weather was perfect and the stroll was lovely, even found the cutest little door entry way and naturally had to stop for a quick photo session. At the beach, we decided to be ultra classy and rent our own chairs and umbrella which had a lovely view of the ocean and a child being driven around in one of those kid size escalades (bc thats what you bring to the beach when you're rich af apparently). That night we had a super relaxing night in sipping champagne and watching some completely terrible reality show on netflix (our favorite hobby).

Woke up the next morning to day four aka MY BIRTHDAY! 25 here I am, I am ready to rumble. The morning started off beautifully with Jenn walking into my room to surprise me with some Mumm Napa champs while recording a video and naturally she walks in to me butt ass naked getting ready for the day. Typical Katie. We decided to do you all a solid and not post that video but alternatively for me to put some clothing on so that we could snap a few others. Then sipped champagne for a good minute before chilling out because not only was it my birthday but it was JET SKI DAY! When we arrived at the Jet Ski place we were tasked with getting our Florida Boating License by taking a 25 question test and let me tell you - taking a test with a bunch of loud obnoxious people around you is #stressful. We both luckily passed on the first try and then were able to spend an hour on the ocean whipping around on our own jet skis. So so so much fun. Low key a little terrifying when you take a turn too fast but hey, I'm the girl that lived. After jet skis, we made a quick change and headed to Sugar Miami an amazing jungley vibes rooftop bar where I had a few too many of the most delicious $18 cocktail and solicited all of my social media friends for money via venmo lol (if you sent me money you're a sweetie pie). FINALLY, my birthday concluded with dinner at the Versace Mansion. Yes, I said the Versace Mansion. Yes, I'm extra. No, my bank account doesn't want to talk about it. We had the most delicious meal, a great bottle of champagne, and I even was serenaded with a Happy Birthday song played by their in house Saxophonist. AMAZING. I truly had the best 25th birthday a girl could've asked for. 

Miami was something freakin' else man. AND I ALMOST FORGOT TO TELL YOU ALL.... the ubers/lyfts there PARK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD TO DROP YOU OFF. Cars just go around them business as usual, it is absolutely insane and my anxiety could not handle it lolol. Anyways - Hawaii on Wednesday but get your fix before then by checking out the VLOG VERSION of this trip by clicking HERE :)


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